OFS Unlimited - Mister Kidneys
‘Mister Kidneys’ is an interesting song in that it belongs to a small shard faction of 70’s funk concerned with third-person descriptions of badass motherfuckers (e.g. ‘Theme from Shaft’, ‘Superfly’, ‘The Mack’). ‘Mister Kidneys’ tells the tale of a ‘son of a gun’ who goes by the name of, well, Mister Kidneys, and you should watch out for him because he is going to eff your girlfriend, and presumably based on his nickname, give her a urinary tract infection. When they were handing out badass nicknames, Mister Kidneys got the uh, shaft, y’all. I would think that someone whose superpower is how easily they can fuck your woman would have a nickname more representative of that - something like Will Hung. Johnny Dick. Gash Stabberson. I dunno.
You can basically hear the tape rotting on the song, and I can only assume it’s because this funk number is so ripe and plain old stankin’, and it’s not hard to imagine the VU meters redlining through this whole recording. Either this song was recorded by an idiot savant or just an idiot, because shit isn’t supposed to sound like this. And I mean this in a good way.
OFS Unlimited have a very small catalog of recorded works - from what I can find their only release was this 45 (b/w ‘Mystic’) on the Columbus, OH Prix label, an obscure funk/soul label who never even made it big in Columbus, let alone state or country-wide.
Check out the dude on the stairs!